Fall 08 Classes

This is my first full semester as a Speech Communication major. I like most of my classes way more than my Liberal Studies classes that I was taking last semester. Here is my opinion my schedule so far:

HCOM 300- Intro to Research in Speech Communication: This class is my least favorite class out of the six. I was warned by my friend Michelle not to take this class from this particular professor. CSUF was only offering this class at one time this semester (8am MWF).. I had to take it either this semester or next so I thought I might as well just take it. I had a feeling that I should. It's a difficult class but I'm just going to have to work a little bit harder.

HCOM 200- Human Communication: Not a very fun class either. We learn about a bunch of communication theories but it is somewhat interesting since we talk about real life issues when it comes to communicating.

HCOM 308- Quantitative Research Methods: This is my second to least favorite class. I don't really care about doing research and different kinds of studies within the communication field. I have this same professor for my HCOM 332 class.

HCOM 220- Interpersonal Conflict Management: I enjoy this class. Interesting topic. Good professor.

HCOM 332- Process of Social Influence: Good class. We talk about advertising a lot and other ways that people try to persuade us.

HCOM 360- Nonverbal Communication: This is my favorite class of them all. Great professor. Very interesting topic.

Summer 08

This summer was pretty cool. It's over now having officially starting my senior year this morning but I enjoyed it. I was in school for two straight sessions of summer school but I enjoyed the classes and it was nice having somewhat of a routine. I got into photography which I enjoy a lot and still have a lot to learn. Being a full-time photographer is the game plan once I graduate next May. My friend Lauren designed my logo and my business card which I'm excited to get printed and passed out to friends and potential clients. I went on a fishing trip up to the Sierra's right after I finished my last final and packed up my remaining items from my dorm. It was good trip even though I wasn't feeling too well. My summer kind of was like a regular semester but instead of taking a bunch of classes I was only taking one for a few hours on three straight days. I still lived out in Orange County, still worked at BA, hung out with friends, and went to Rock Harbor. Summer wasn't bad and taking the two classes this summer were necessary in order for my to graduate next May. I'm stoked about graduating and I think about it far too often. It's exciting though and I enjoy thinking about what life is going to be like.

Hope Regained

I'm back at the Hope International University dorms once again. I didn't really want to come back here for my senior year but that is the way that things worked out. It's not that bad and I definitely am enjoying eating at cafeteria once again.

What I've Been Up To

This summer has been unique. Lots of things have happened that I could not have predicted. I plan on writing an entry summarizing my summer before school starts in a few weeks. I haven't been very persistant with keeping up the blog but since I have a speech tomorrow that I'm procrastinating on, I thought it was apropos for me to write something:

- The speech that I'm working on is for my Public Speaking class. We've done four speaches already and this one is the last speech of the class. I'm talking about drunk driving and the ways to prevent it from happening. I've enjoyed this class. My professor is a super nice lady who has a ton of personality. This has been one of my top 5 favorite classes at Cal State Fullerton so far.

- My friend Chad was able to get my website developed and looking nice. You can check it out at maguirephotos.com . The main thing that is holding me back from going all out with this photography stuff is not having a legit logo. I have a few friends who are into graphic design but I'm not super close to anyone of them. Once I get a nice looking logo I can get my business cards out and hopefully start getting some more gigs. I have some stuff lined up but all of the dates are TBA.

- It looks like I might be going back to the Hope International dorms for my last year of college. I'm not super excited to be going back and things might ultimately change. It would be great to grub at the cafeteria again but I like the "grown up" feel of having the apartment.

- I've done a decent amount of reading this summer. Just finished a book called "Prophet of the Sandlots" by Mark Winegardner. The author traveled for around a year with an old baseball scout who was arguably the most successful scout in the history of baseball.

- I registered for classes a few weeks ago and will pick one last class once Titan II begins. I'm only going to classes Tuesday and Thursday and I have one class Wednesday at four. One of my goals for this last semester is to strike a good balance between wanting to graduate and enjoying my last year of school. I know that I'm going to miss college once I've graduated but I also just want to be finished with it and move on to the next chapter of my life.

Photography

I'm starting to get into photography. There is so much stuff to learn! It's not as simple as I thought it was going to be. Thankfully I have friends who know what they are doing and are willing to help a brother out when he has a question or two. I want to start shooting weddings eventually. I might be shooting my manager at Black Angus' wedding. That should be cool and it would allow me to build my portfolio. I'm trying to set up my website (www.maguirephotos.com) but I've been having trouble logging into the control panel from hostmonster.com. Hopefully the website will be up and running sometime this week. I could potentially see myself being a full-time photographer.

Not Living the Dream

I wish I was playing professional baseball. That's been my dream since I was a kid. I'm reading a book right now called "Harvard Boys" which is about a guy named John Wolff who played baseball at Harvard and then was drafted by the Chicago White Sox. He journals about his day to day experiences playing minor league ball and after most of the entries his dad comments about his experience playing pro ball back when he was younger. I wish I could be playing baseball everyday, working my way through the minor leagues. I could be working everyday to try to make it to the big leagues with a ton of other guys who have the exact same goal. The competition would be amazing! I'm just one of millions of people who will never get that shot.

People

It looks like from now on people are going to be doing their own thing. People are getting married, on the road to getting married, or just have other big time commitments. Things are never going to be how they used to be. The community that I once enjoyed does not exist anymore and it's just going to keep dissolving more and more as time goes on. After graduation who knows what things are going to look like. People are going to move away and the most interaction we will have is maybe a facebook message here and there. It's just part of life. Full-time jobs, house payments, children and other responsibilities are just around the corner for some.

Home

It feels so good to have a permanent place to live. I'm going to be staying at my friend Bryson's apartment for the summer. I was crashing at my old apt and my friend James' place for almost a week. I feel like I can breathe a lot easier now. Not having your own place can be stressful.

The Cause

I want to find a cause to fight for. I've been thinking recently and I've come to the conclusion that I want to have an occupation where I'm making a difference in the world and in individual people's lives. I'm just not sure what that is going to look like. What cause do I want to fight for? There are so many to choose from. One of my favorite quotes is from a man named Gil Bailie. One of my favorite authors John Eldredge used this quote in his famous book Wild at Heart. Baile says, "Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive". I can see why John would dig that quote. I want to find something that makes me feel completely alive. I want to put my whole heart into something and try to change things for the better.

Summer

It's almost here! I want to do a lot of things this summer. I still have school and work but there is so much more I plan on doing. I want to learn how do play the piano. Everybody and their mother plays the guitar but I want to try something different. I plan on looking on ebay soon for a somewhat inexpensive keyboard. I also want to learn how to drive a stick shift. It's a skill that could come in handy one of these days. I want to use a decent amount of my time reading some of the many books that I want to check out. I've recently gotten into working out so I plan on continuing to do that as well.

The Books I Read

I like to read books about peoples lives. How did this person deal with the circumstances that they were born into? What were their dreams? How did they try to achieve them? What obstacles were in their way and how did they overcome them? How did they learn from their failures? I haven't really lived too much during my 21 years. I've done some pretty cool things and seen some beautiful places but there is so much more that I want to see and do. Hopefully the journey is just beggining. I find it interesting reading about what people do with their lives. I'm in the midst of two autobiographical books right now which detail two very different lives:

The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch

Randy Pausch has pancreatic cancer and only has a few months to live. He was a professor at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburg and gave his "last lecture" detailing what he learned in life and how he fulfilled his dreams. He is trying to make the most of his time left on earth by spending time with his family and by just enjoying life. He was recently named one of the 100 Most Influential People by Time Magazine. Video of his last lecture can be found on the internet if you want to check it out.

Tweak by Nic Sheff

Nic Sheff messed up his life by getting into drugs. He was from the Bay Area and then went to college out in Massachusetts. He starts doing crystal meth and soon becomes an addict. I'm at the part of the book where him and a friend start dealing the stuff.

Both of these men had similar chances to do whatever they wanted with their lives. One became a college professor who specialized in virtual reality systems while the other messed up his life significantly at an early age by getting into drugs. I find it interesting to see what people do with their time here on earth.

The End of the Semester

I have one more day of class on Friday and then finals next week. I'm so looking forward to being done with this semester. To know that I never have to take math, science, english or history again is a good feeling. It's all communications from here on out. Whether I'm going to like that is a different story. I've only taken one communications class which was during my freshman year. I didn't really like it way too much but it wasn't horrible. Finals week is usually no fun, but after my last final on Friday I'm going fishing and camping with some friends which should be cool. I'm definitely not the best fisherman in the world though. I haven't caught a fish in about 10 years. It's not that I haven't gone fishing since then but when I go I just don't get catch any when I go. It's kind of embarassing seing little kids fishing alongside of you pulling in fish while you haven't even gotten a bite.

Life

On Sunday night I went to the first official Bandette concert at one of Merrilee's professors houses. I sat in on this lady's class one time during the Fall 06 semester. I hadn't seen her for a really long time. Before Bandette started their set Dr. Salono talked about how she almost died this past year and you could just tell that she was thankful to be alive and with her family. That was interesting for me to see and it got me thinking. There have been points in my life recently where I wasn't thankful for being alive and sometimes would have preferred not to be. But to see this woman so thankful to be alive and to be with her children was inspiring. Life is filled with suffering, disappointments and other negative components but simply being with those who are most important to you is what really matters.

Summer School

I'm taking 2 classes this summer. I'm kind of looking forward to them as strange as that sounds. It will make me one step closer to getting my degree. The downside is that my class during the 1st session of the summer starts at 8am. That's not going to be fun. I'm really looking forward to taking Communications classes. My classes right now are pretty bad.

Major Change #4

I'm going to change my major again. This time I'm going with Speech Communication with an emphasis in Interpersonal Communication. I really don't like my current major (Liberal Studies). If you don't know what Liberal Studies is it's just a broad education plan that mostly future elementary school teachers do. I can still graduate next Spring with this new major which is great. As far as what I'm going to do with this new degree, who knows?

Time Passing By

I spend too much time in the future. I wonder about different potentials without spending too much time in the present. I'm not a big fan of the here and now for myself. I lack passion in almost every area of my life. Sometimes I don't even have the desire to get out of my passion-less state. Life is weird.

The Tournament

The CSUF Titans have won the Big West Championship and are headed to the NCAA Basketball Tournament. We haven't made it there since 1978. 30 years ago. It's an exciting time. I was able to make it out to all of the playoff games that we played in this year. It was exhilarating to charge the Anaheim Convention Centers court after time expired in the Championship Game versus UC Irvine. Jumping up and down, yelling, holding my "number one" finger in the air, celebrating with the players. Oh man. It was great.

Semester #6

This semester is filled with crappy classes. Here is the mid-semester review:

Math 303a- Me and math get along about as good as Boston and New York fans. I have been known to flip off multiple unresponsive math text books in my time. It's a boring class where we learn about mostly useless stuff than I will probably never use. I have it at 8:30am which makes it even less enjoyable. The worst part is that I have to take math 303b before I graduate.

English 211- This class is one of my least favorites. I don't do the reading and that is all we talk about in class. I do manage to create some pretty cool doodles in my notebook though.

Liberal Studies 302a- This is the class that I got a C- in that I have to retake. Stupid plus/minus system. We have three exams and that is it. I feel like I did pretty well on the 1st one. I have to take 302b before I graduate which is also a difficult class. I think that I'm going to take it during summer school.

English 341- Children's Literature- This class is similar to English 211 in that we spend a lot of time talking about the assigned reading. The professor assigns a ton of it too. This class is super long going from 4-6:45. It's only on Mondays though.

Biology 453- This is my only class that I have on Fridays. It is a lab and a lecture. It is almost a four hour class. It's not too difficult which is nice. The material is the most interesting out of any class that I am taking this semester.

Where Am Going?

I'm lost. I think about my future all the time. I have about 1 year of school left and I have no idea what I want to do after I graduate. I know, I know "Lots of people are in the same boat". But that only helps ease my frustrations a little. I'm majoring in Liberal Studies which is mainly for people who want to teach elementary school students. I don't want to do that for the rest of my life, or even part of it. I just wish I had my diploma. It's not like high school where you know that your diploma is going to come exactly 4 years after you start HS. There are people here in college that have graduated HS years before I did and are still chasing after that piece of paper. I imagine that it's going to be nice to be a college graduate, but then what?

Why?

Why do I feel so crappy? Why do I feel fine one week and the next I'm feeling depressed? Why do I feel lonely when I have friends who care about me?

I'm in Love

...with the Hope University Cafeteria. Man, this is so cool. I have a buffet within walking distance from my new dorm. I can have as much food as I want. This sure beats the heck out of the days of tv dinners and hot pockets. I have so many choices. I initially said that I wasn't going to live at Hope next year but I'm not so sure anymore.

2008

So many different things can happen this year. I have no clue how it is going to turn out which is part of what makes it exciting. I love how their is always a new beggining every Jan 1st. If your 07 wasn't the greatest, nothing says that 08 can't be better.

Happy Birthday Blog!

Today is the one year anniversary of my first post here on coreofmyinnerbeing.blogspot.com. It has been an interesting year. I would say that it was the best year of my life. I'm hoping that 2008 will be even better. Thanks to everyone who checks this website out. I appreciate it.